Are You Drowning? Some Relationships Are Like Water

Relationships. That word will bring different thoughts, feelings and emotions to each and every one of us. Some people may think of friends, others of family; some people will get a happy feeling and others a sad feeling. But for all of these emotions, relationships are like water. 

Regardless of the emotion behind it the word, relationships are like water; they either move us forward, try to hold us back, or worst of all, keeping us in a state of “un-moving.” As leaders, we have to know how to balance the water in our lives and manage our relationships.

Relationships that move us forward: These relationships encourage and develop us. They work with us to help us achieve either a common goal or a goal we've set for ourselves. Individuals who fit in this category would be considered mentors, advisers, friends and family. Keep in mind that an objective opinion and solid advice may come from people outside those who move us forward.

Relationships that hold us back: At first glance these types of relationships may seem to be against us, trying to prevent us from reaching our potential, and cutting us down. While that may be the case sometimes, I hope it's not the norm.

Take for example someone who is in training to competitively swim. Do they swim with the current? No. They swim against it so they develop strength.

Relationships that appear to be holding us back may simply be strengthening our muscles, building new ones, and teaching us things about ourselves we didn't know before. (Tweet that!) Individuals in this category often make good advisers since they'll typically have a differing point of view from us and sometimes know how to push us beyond what we thought ourselves capable.

Relationships that keep us “un-moving”: These relationships are the ones who take your success as their loss. They don't want you to win because they think it will make them feel or look bad.

One thing I've learned over the years is that not everyone deals well with others' successes. Life, like business and personal development, is not a zero-sum game. You winning does not mean I have to lose. And vice versa.

Stay clear of these types of relationships. Don't let them bring you down and most importantly do not let them into your inner circle of mentors and advisers.

So, stay in the water that is keeping you moving forward but don't (always) shy away from resistance. Just make sure you're always moving.